Mental health minute: Too perfect and too much: two forms of ...

It's 8 a.m. and time to leave for school, but "Jessica" is still in her room combing her hair -- again and again -- so that it is "just right." Her mother is getting frustrated as they are going to be late again.

Jessica's real problem isn't tardiness. It is her struggle with extreme perfectionism, a little understood form of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. It's the way her brain works. It's like riding a bike with broken spokes. She's not riding the bike wrong; there is something wrong with the bike. No one is at fault -- including Jessica.

Adults with this perfectionism fear disappointing and go to great lengths to do what they feel will avoid criticism. They are almost paralyzed with negative self-talk. OCD for them is an anxiety disorder.

Even a simple mistake is a catastrophe and criticism of any kind is emotionally intolerable. They avoid positive risks, because they are so afraid of falling short. If left untreated, Jessica's perfectionism may rob her of the motivation she will need to go to college.

Often it is the family who insists on counseling as the sufferer feels their routine is reassuring and normal. Therapists begin by asking, "What's the worst thing that can happen?"

Then the therapist and client form a plan and through time scale back the repetition of compulsive or perfectionistic behaviors.

Counselor and client identify ways to reframe and relieve the anxiety other than repetition, perfectionism or checking.

Hoarding is not just the subject of a popular television program but another form of OCD. Hoarders can barely live in their homes because of the massive amounts of accumulated "stuff." Often the items are meaningless things that the sufferer just can't give up.

It will now take more than a spring cleaning to help them. Hoarding is interfering with their lives.

A word of caution to loved ones, don't go in and throw things away for the hoarder in your family. This escalates the anxiety that is at the root of hoarding.

A person with a hoarding disorder needs compassion and counseling first, not housekeeping.

Manatee Glens psychotherapist Barbara Morelli, M.S., LMHC recommends a form of therapy that includes motivational interviewing. "My clients ask themselves, 'What good is in it for me?' 'What would my life look like if I were able to change this?' 'What positive would come from that?'"

With support from their counselor and family, persons with OCD can learn to find other ways to relieve anxiety and find security that won't interfere with their lives or burden their loved ones.

As they recognize the negative consequences and problems of OCD, they can acquire the techniques that address their anxiety. They can live with the personal and individual solutions they choose to improve their lives.

Mary Ruiz, is president/CEO of Manatee Glens, a specialty hospital and outpatient practice for mental health and addictions, headquartered in Bradenton.

Source: http://www.bradenton.com/2013/03/05/4419917/mental-health-minute-too-perfect.html

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